Ice Bucket Social Media

So, I originally started this as a status posted on Facebook, but then it got far too long so here I am turning to my blog. This post isn't going to be as long as my other ones, but I feel like it is significant none-the-less.

I was recently nominated by one of my best friends to do the ALS ice bucket challenge and while I understand the "terms" of this, I have let the 24 hour deadline pass and will not nominate anyone in return. This is not because I don't think ALS is an unworthy cause or because I am "no fun". I choose not to pour a bucket of ice over my head because I think a lot of people are doing this for the wrong reasons.

I know that the ALS foundation has earned a lot of money from this challenge and I think that is an AMAZING thing. It's a terrible, crippling disease and research needs to be done to find a cure, or at least find a way to better manage the progression of the disease. I know a lot of celebrities and even some "regular" individuals have donated a lot, or a little bit, of money to this cause and have done all they can to raise large sums of money.

But, the fact of the matter is a lot of people are doing this to simply "jump on the bandwagon". They think, "Hey! I was just nominated to dump a bucket of ice over my head, so I'm gonna make a video that all my friends and people on Facebook can see and then make more people do it so I don't have to raise money,". "It will be fun," they say. So, they make their video, they post it online using whatever social media they prefer and then they don't think twice about it.

That is the WRONG reason to do the ice bucket challenge.

This challenge was started by the ALS foundation to raise awareness for their cause and to raise money to be used towards research and anything else that would help people see how terrible this disease is and how many people are affected by it each year. It is a great idea. I have seen several social media posts about it, watched segments on the national and local news, and read articles in newspapers about how this is sweeping the nation. It's great to see people doing this for the right reasons... Dumping a bucket of ice over their heads and then raising/donating money for a great organization.

It was NOT started to become a social media "bandwagon" phase, similar to planking and the cinnamon challenge.

Even though I will not be donating money to the ALS foundation (like I said before, it's a great cause and I have nothing against the organization), that doesn't mean I won't be donating money. In fact, I donate money every year to a charity that is near and dear to me.

My brother was diagnosed with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy at a young age. This male affected neuromuscular disease is a process of muscle degeneration where muscles turn to fat as the disease progresses and muscle use is no longer possible. Usually by the age of twelve, boys with Duchenne are confined to a wheelchair because calf and thigh muscles have begun to degenerate into a fatty mass. Talipes sets in, which means the soles of the feet turn inward, and contractures of the knees and elbows are common. Contractures are the shortening of muscles due to prolonged immobility, in the case of Duchenne, from sitting in a wheelchair with no muscle use in the legs. Slowly joints become fixed and arms and legs are no longer able to be stretched out to their full length. As the person progresses into their teenage years, many Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy patients develop scoliosis, which is the curvature of the spine, because back muscles no longer support the body in an upright position. A spine straightening procedure may be used to correct the curvature by inserting metal rods with hooks into the spine. This is a relatively common surgery among those with the disease and the recovery time is just a few weeks. In addition to muscle limbs having degeneration, heart muscles also lack necessary dystrophin and they begin to degenerate as well.

The diaphragm and other muscles in the lung also begin to weaken. Symptoms of weakening lungs include difficulty breathing, headaches, and trouble concentrating and staying awake. With the weakened lung muscles comes a greater chance for infection and the common cold can easily lead to pneumonia. Males affected by this disease usually live until their mid twenties, possibly their early thirties, with a cause of death being heart or lung failure.

In other words, the disease sucks and it honestly heartbreaking to watch someone so close to you go through something so terrible. It sucks to know that no matter what you do, you can't make it better or go away. It's a terrible, crippling disease and I HATE that my brother, and others like him, have to go through all this pain.

But, that being said, it has made me a more compassionate person because you never know what someone is going through or facing in their everyday life. You can't judge a book by it's cover. It has also let me get to know about an incredible organization; the Muscular Dystrophy Association (MDA). 

Ever since I was a little girl, my family was involved in various MDA fundraising benefits, Christmas parties, and other events to raise money and awareness of neuromuscular diseases. I have gotten to know many families and individuals who are affected by terrible muscles diseases, but still find a reason to smile and keep pursuing their dreams. It's truly amazing how much this organization really cares about those that they are trying to help.

I'm sure people have seen the "Fill a Boot" fundraisers done by local firefighters. I'm sure people have watched, or at least known about, the annual Labor Day MDA "Show of Strength" telethon. I'm sure people have at least heard the name Jerry Lewis in passing. These are all people or fundraising feats done in support of the MDA.

Because of my brother and this wonderful organization, I have an "Ice Bucket Challenge" to complete each and every year....

Besides from the fact that I help to "Fill the Boot" whenever I see one or the fact that I always donate a few dollars everytime I see one of those Shamrocks that stores post on their walls, I have made a personal donation to MDA every single year for as long as I have remembered. It may not always be a lot of money, but each year I make my donation. I fully believe in the MDA foundation and the research they are doing every year. I watch the Telethon, which usually makes me sob like a baby when I watch the stories of those affected by muscle disease, and I donate whatever I can at the time. It may not be tomorrow, it may not even be when my brother can see the benefits, but I truly hope that one day, there will be a cure for neuromuscular disease.

But, none of this research can be done if no one is watching and listening and donating. Research is expensive and it needs donations, no matter how big or small.

So, this is my challenge to you. Pick something you are passionate about. Do you know someone that has passed away from cancer? Do you have a family member who is facing a disease that doesn't have a cure? Do you love the fact that a certain hospital let's patients attend without facing any medical costs, like St. Jude's? Has Robin Williams' death affected you so much that you don't want anyone facing depression to go unnoticed? What makes you passionate?

Decide this and then go out and donate. Maybe it's just buying a pink ribbon for breast cancer that goes to support research. Maybe it's throwing a few coins into a local collection bin. Maybe it's taking matters into your own hands and raising money from friends and family to donate a large sum. Maybe it's running/walking in a Pancreatic Cancer 5k or Heart Walk. Anything is better than nothing.

Don't just jump on the bandwagon and complete a challenge because social media asked you. Question why they are doing this. Where the "craze" started. How you can learn more. Why they need your help. Challenge yourself because you want to. Not because you want your friends to see you post a video.

*I also just want to say that I'm not knocking anyone for completing this challenge. By re-posting videos and nominating others, you are keeping the awareness going and that's always a good thing. And I know sometimes life sucks and money is tight and it's not always possible to donate. This is just my take on how I think some people are doing this for the wrong reason... It's so much more than dumping a bucket of ice on your head. It's a foundation and a movement that will benefit so many people. It's something to be passionate about. It's something to learn from.

More Than...

I feel like there comes a time in everyone's life where there is an over-abundance of "baby announcing" going on. Every time you turn around, a family member, a co-worker, a past classmate, a friend...someone is announcing they are pregnant. There is a shower to attend every other weekend or you are helping to plan a shower. You have to go see so-and-so at the hospital because his/her baby was just born. Babies R' Us, Buy Buy Baby, and Target become like second homes. It feels like everyone is having a baby.

I have officially reached that point in my life.

In the past year alone, both my sister-in-law and I have given birth, a family friend has given birth, a close friend has announced her pregnancy, my sister is going to be a mom for the second time around, my husband's cousin is due to give birth any day, and several past classmates have either given birth or are soon going to be giving birth. I have gone to so many showers, have been shopping at Babies R' Us like it's my job, and received countless birth announcements in the mail that it's gotten to the point where it's almost comical. I feel like this time in my life is "the baby boom".

Don't get me wrong, I am more than happy for these people. They all deserve to experience the joy of becoming a mom or dad for the first time. And a lot of them have been there to support me throughout my two pregnancies and my children's lives. It's truly amazing that so many people are reaching this special time in their lives. Plus, babies are adorable. Who doesn't like to hold a newborn and smell their sweet baby scent?!

What does bother me are the inevitable things that people say at those showers, in the hospital, or while visiting a newborn baby. I can't count on two hands, or both my feet, how many times I have heard the saying, "Enjoy your time with each other now because once the baby is here, you aren't going to get a moment alone." Or "Say goodbye to all your freedom". Or my personal favorite, "Your time with friends and going out is over once the baby comes".

All of these sayings make me so angry and to be honest, I can't help but judge the people who say them, just a little bit.

First, the parents-to-be are trying to enjoy this time in their lives. They are overjoyed to be given the blessing of having a baby. They cannot wait to hold their newborn. To whisper sweet nothings in their ears. To shower their little ones with kisses and hugs and love. To finally add the title of mom and dad to their names. It's a beautiful time. And here these people go, spouting off that their life is going to be ruined once the baby comes. That it's going to change so much that who they are now will be unrecognizable. Just let the new parents be happy. They have an idea of how life is going to change once they add a little one to the mix. They have accepted that. Let them soak in every moment and praise and "Congratulations" they can get. It's their right and it's what is going to make them happy and be able to welcome their sweet baby into the world with open arms and open hearts.

But, secondly, and most importantly, just because you are a parent, or are becoming a parent, doesn't mean that who you are and what you do is going to be forgotten. Sure life changes drastically the second you give birth. You are now responsible for a tiny, human life. This child before you is going to rely on you, and your partner, to be the sole provider of their health, happiness, and nutrition. They cannot do anything for themselves; it's up to you to feed them, change them, clean them, dress them, and teach them about the world around them.

Those first six weeks or so are rough. Babies don't sleep on a regular schedule so you have to adjust your schedule to accommodate them. You have to wake up at all hours of the night and day to feed and change them. You have to take them to frequent doctor's visits. You have to find the balance of what diapers work best and how to breastfeed or what formula is going to sit well in your baby's stomach. You have to learn what makes your baby happy. And you have to do all of this while healing from the process of giving birth, managing work, keeping yourself (or spouse or other children) fed, doing the laundry, and having a somewhat liveable, clean house. It's exhausting. Your hormones are all over the place. You don't get enough sleep. It's a beautiful time because you have this amazing new life in your world. But it's also a lot to handle; it's a big adjustment.

But even with such a big adjustment to your life, just because you are a mom or dad, that doesn't mean that that is all you are. That everything else you were before, or everything you can be in the future, ceases to exist. It also doesn't mean that just because you are a mom or dad, your social life goes away...

I became a mom for the first time at young age; I got pregnant at 20 and gave birth at 21. Which means when all my friends were at college, or partying it up for their 21st birthdays, I was carrying around a significant baby belly and prepping for becoming a mom. Which was totally fine with me. But it was obviously a very different life than what my friends were living and it was incredibly hard to find time to make those two worlds mesh together. Even when I became a mom to my little boy, I was 26 and most of my friends weren't even married yet. Some of them weren't even engaged or dating someone regularly. And here I was once again meshing two different worlds together in order to find a balance between motherhood and having a social life. It was hard and to be honest, it's still hard.

But, I want to be so much more than a mom...

Being a mom is the BEST thing that has ever happened to me. I still find it odd to believe that the well-being and happiness of two tiny humans is my responsibility. I carried them around in my belly. I've been there to kiss away every tear and share in every smile. I have cared for them when they are sick. I have taught them how to be independent. I help my daughter with homework. I play with my son and watch him master a new skill every day. They are sweet, and beautiful, and kind, and smart, and perfect. I am so proud of who they are and that they call me mom. It is my biggest responsibility and my greatest joy to be a mom. I would drop anything and do anything for them in a heartbeat. They will always come first for me.

But, I want to be so much more than a mom...

I want to have a career and be an educator. It's why I went back to school. It's why I applied for a job recently. I want to educate children. I want to inspire them to be so much more than they can dream of. I want to provide a good foundation for their schooling and for life. I want to be a role model to them. I have wanted to be a teacher since I was a little girl and I am still chasing my dream.

But, I want to be so much more than a teacher...

I want to be a student. I want to go back to school and earn my Bachelors degree. I want to eventually earn my Masters. I want to educate myself as much as I can so I can always be up-to-date on educational issues that are facing students, schools, and the government. I want to soak in all the knowledge I possibly can so that I have more opportunities in my field of work. I love the idea of learning and being in the classroom. I actually love school and being a student makes me happy. Even if I don't always love the work that goes along with it.

But, I want to be so much more than a student...

I want to be a writer. My ideal career is to be a preschool or Kindergarten teacher. But, my passion has always been writing. I love to read. I soak in all the books I can. Young adult, romance, fiction, non-fiction, biographies, religious texts, everything. Whatever I can get my hands on, I read. I have always envied those who can create an elaborate world and inspire millions of people to buy their books and fall in love with their characters. But, I suck at that. I cannot create memorable characters or distinct worlds that people can actually imagine themselves in. What I can do is write about myself and my life experiences. I think that's the only thing I'm actually good at writing. Which is a little vain, but I'll go with it. I love to write. It releases a lot of stress and when people actually give me good feedback, it fuels my hunger for writing even more.

But, I want to be so much more than a writer...

I want to have fun. I want to have a social life. I love going out and having drinks with my friends. I love being able to lounge around the house and have silly days with those I love. I love going out dancing. I love heading out to concert every once in a while. I enjoy being able to go to the casino and waste a few bucks on the slots. It's nice to be able to step away from my everyday life of being a responsible parent to just having fun with friends or family. I don't want to be the "boring" mom. The one who goes to bed at 8 every night. Who has the same routine everyday. Who doesn't go out with her friends. Whose sole companionship is her husband and her kids. I would literally go crazy if that was me. You need close friends who you can be silly with, who you can vent to, who you can just relax with. I need that. I enjoy that.

I want to be so much more than a mom.

I feel like once you become a mom, everyone sees you as someone different. They think that just because you have a baby and a family, you can't go out and have a drink. They think that you don't have the time to go to a concert with them. They think that you can't go out and do all the things that they are doing. All because you have added a new person to your life and a title to your name. But, that's not true.

You can be so much more than a mom or a dad. Just like you can be more than a friend. More than an uncle or an aunt. More than what your career is. You don't have to be just one single thing. Just because you are a mom doesn't mean that you can't go out and have fun. It doesn't mean that you don't have friends anymore. It doesn't mean that you forget everything that existed before you had a baby. Some parents do this. And if that is what makes them happy, then fine. That's their thing. But, it doesn't have to be that way if you don't want it to be.

You may have to rearrange your plans for the night. You may have to say no to a couple get-togethers. You may have to make sure you have a babysitter for the night before you say yes to a friend. But, you don't have to be just a mom or just a dad. You can be the best mom or dad you can be and still be a friend, and have a career, and do whatever you feel passionate about.

So, the next time someone says, "Oh, you're having a baby. Kiss your freedom good-bye," tell them to shove it. Because you don't have to say good-bye to your freedom or your friends or who you want to be. You can be so much more than a mom.

I know I want to be so much more.

Speaking the Truth

Before you continue reading this, there are two facts you should be aware of:

• First, I started, and continue, to write this blog because it expresses my feelings at the moment. It's another way for me to get everything off my chest so I don't talk the ear off my family and friends about the same things a hundred times. I have feelings. I like to write. This works for me.
• Second, this blog isn't meant to "call anyone out". It's how I feel about people in general. It's what I believe and what's on my mind right now.

So, with that said, if you are easily offended or if you don't want to hear my opinions, stop reading now. This blog is what I believe to be true. Plain and simple.

There are two quotes that I live my life by. To me they explain everything. And I fully believe them to be true based on my past experiences. The first is, "Everything happens for a reason". And the second is, "People don't change". The latter of the two is what is really "bothering" me lately.

I firmly believe, and have seen my whole life, the fact that people don't change. If you're an addict, you are always an addict. If you are a cheater, you are always a cheater. If you're a selfish person, you are always going to be selfish. I have seen these personalities all my life and the story is always the same....

My father is an addict. He's been one for his whole life. It runs in his family. He started drinking at a young age. I remember him smashing his fist into walls in drunken rages went I was little. I remember seeing the empty beer cans hidden downstairs as a teenager when he was supposed to be sober. I remember having my husband search for him at all hours of the night because he was drunk and driving and no one knew where he was. He had an accident at work and started using painkillers. Always blaming the accident, he somehow found a doctor who would prescribe him meds whenever he wanted. There was never confirmed proof of it by my eyes, but I know he took to street drugs as well. He let one addiction become another and finally became someone who I no longer knew and someone who my children have no idea of. He let his addiction win. That's not why I don't talk to him... He's hurt me in ways that I'm not ready to forgive yet. And honestly, he makes me uncomfortable.

He's supposedly sober now. But I feel that even if he's sober, he still is and always will be an addict. It's part of who he is. It's part of his personality. 

Now I am not saying that people who are addicts can't change their ways. It is possible to become fully sober. You can be a recovering alcoholic or drug addict or whatever. But, you will always be an addict. That temptation is always there. It's always going to be a part of you. And often, there is always a replacement for addiction. Maybe it's food or lotto tickets or cigarettes. But, either way, it's an addiction. Something to drown your troubles in and take the edge off. Just because you are a reformed whatever doesn't mean that you have changed. You are still that addict.

The same goes for people who are selfish. Just because you have a baby or get married or get out of high school doesn't mean that you are going to stop being selfish. You will always be selfish. Same goes for people who are cheaters. They just cheat in different ways. Or they sink back into the starting of their old habits and pull themselves out of it before it gets too far. And liars will always be liars. It's a coping mechanism. Even if it's a white lie, it's still a lie. And those people who are shitty parents/siblings/relatives/brothers/sisters/ect, will always be shitty parents. Just because you post an, "I'm so proud of my daughter" picture or "Keep this picture going if you love your father with all your heart" on Facebook doesn't mean that we are fooled. There are people out there who know the real you and who know what you do off of social media. You are still a shitty person despite the fact that posted a beautiful, touching quote or picture. 

Plain and simple, people don't change. Your personality is still there. No one can change that no matter how hard they try. It's the reason why relationships based on, "Oh, he'll change once we get engaged," or "She'll be different once we have a baby," or "He just needs to get settled into his job and then he will be different" don't work. They are who they are and you need to accept them for their faults or get out. 

Now, at the ripe old age of twenty-seven, I honestly feel like I know exactly what I want out of life and who I want to tolerate in my life. I have no use for high school drama that some people thrive on their entire lives. I have no want to play nice with people on social media (that is why my friends list is so short...I don't want to be friends on Facebook if we haven't talked in ten years or if we have "bad blood" between us). I love my family more than life itself. I would do anything for my children. I want to be a teacher someday. I want to have a career and be okay with my financial situation. I want to get over my stupid fear of driving so I can be an adult and be there for my kids. These are all goals that I work on each and every day. These are all things that I try live my life by.

Knowing what I want, and who I want, in life makes it unbelievably hard to "play nice". I have gotten to the point that I no longer want to be the "nice, goody-two-shoes". I don't want to be a doormat anymore. I'm not saying that I let people walk all over me, but I also let people take advantage of my niceness. And I honestly see no point in being a good person to those who treat me like crap. I just want to tell everyone how I feel and then be like, "To hell with you,". I can't be around people who bring me down or people who are self-absorbed or people who take advantage of the fact that I will do anything for them. I am literally sick of it. It's frustrating.

But, here's the thing. People don't change. I believe that about myself as well. I'm not just going to turn into a raging bitch who cuts everyone out of her life. I'm too nice. I will always be the girl who gives someone her last penny. I will always be the person who plays nice. I will always be the person to offer advice even if the person I'm giving advice to never, ever takes it. It's who I am. I have been this way since I was a little girl and I will continue to be this way until I am a ninety year old woman. But, this doesn't mean that I am always nice or always will be. I can call people out and tell them where to go every once in a while. But, deep down I am who I am. I am the "nice" girl.

And even though I have accepted the fact that people don't change and I don't change, it still bothers me so much. It makes me so sad and frustrated to see those I love not reciprocating in the same way. It feels like no matter how nice I am or how hard I try, there are certain people who will never return the favor. They will forever take advantage. They will always be selfish. They will always think that they are right and I am not. It's disheartening. I wish things were different. I wish I could just tell them off and then they would change and be equal in the relationship.

But none of that is going to happen. I can talk my head off time and time again (and I have) and nothing will change. Because people don't change.

Lately I Feel Crafty...

*Just want to make a small note before I do my thing! Any products or stores mentioned in this post are just stores and products I like. They have in no way paid me to write this post, nor asked that I do so. Also, this page is just what I did and any pictures or anything that I show or write is my own work. I did not copyright anyone and any coincidences are just that; coincidental.*

Ok, now that I have my bases covered, let's get started!

Lately I have a small problem... I CANNOT STOP pinning pins from Pinterest (http://www.pinterest.com/)! I must have created about three boards in the past few days and pinned about a thousand pins. I have sent pins. I have looked at pins. I have shared pins on Facebook. It's just bananas! Seriously... I went on a pinning spree! If you don't have Pinterest, go sign up! And if you do, then you understand my addiction.

Well, like my book blog that I posted a while ago, I decided to turn my obsession into something positive. I am going to share my craftiness with you lovely people (if anyone reads this blog) and possibly create a pin of my very own on Pinterest! I hope you enjoy it and maybe find some inspiration!

This upcoming week is Teacher Appreciation Week at my daughter's school. The school is throwing a bunch of little events for the teachers, assistants, staff, ect... all week long. I volunteered to bake some yummy chocolate chip cookies for the staff room and they are also hosting a teacher's breakfast on Monday. But, I like to show Amelia's favorite teachers a little extra love. So, I let her pick the teachers that she wanted to give small gifts to and then we made some homemade cards. I love crafting so we got creative and used stickers, construction paper, pom-poms, and sequins to create personalized cards. My daughter did most of it herself and wrote some of the things she liked about each teacher on their card. We got $15 gift cards to Target and then placed each gift card and homemade card in cute gift bag and Voila!, we had a cute, inexpensive gift. But, I wanted to take it one step further for the teacher who is there for her throughout the day; her kindergarten teacher.

I went on Pinterest to gather a few ideas and saw a pin about getting a reusable cup, filling it with tea packets and making a sign that says, "You are a "tea"rific teacher!". I thought that was adorable and as it so happens, I had a cute mason jar at home that doubled as a cup with a straw. Perfect! I decided to get to work...

For this project, my supply list included:

1 mason jar cup (I obtained mine in a four pack from Zulily, which is another GREAT website btw)
Crystal Light "On the Go" drink packets (I got a great deal at Target... Buy three boxes, get one free and each box contained 10 packets)

• I used Natural Pink Lemonade, Peach Mango Green Tea, Natural Lemon Iced Tea, and Raspberry Lemonade

1 Target gift card (mine was $15...just a little something extra)

1 piece of heavy-duty scrapbooking paper (Which can be obtained at any craft store, such as A.C. Moore or JoAnn Fabrics, in packs or as single sheets of paper)

1 set of alphabet letter stickers (Which can also be purchased at any craft store)

1 pair of scissors

A length of string in any color (I used white...just what I had lying around the house)

1 hole punch (if available)

Scotch tape or glue (depending on preference)

I set up all my supplies on the dining room table and got to work.... Please just use caution when attempting this craft. We are using scissors and hole punches so be careful!

1. First, I got my heavy duty scrapbooking paper (I chose green) and started applying my alphabet letters (silver because I thought it would stand out nicely on the green). I started at the top left hand corner as close to the edge as I could so I wouldn't have to make as many cuts later on. Plus, it would give me straighter edges.
2. I placed "You are a" on the top line and then switched to the second line. This is all a matter of preference. I had a small mason jar and didn't want the sign to be too large, so I put only a few words on each line. Just be creative and think about how you want the final product to come out.
3. Next came the play on words... the "tea"-rific part (instead of terrific). Since the Crystal Light packages came with cute little tea leaf pictures on the box that said "tea" I figured that would be cute to put on the sign. I opened up one of my Crystal Light boxes, emptied out the tea packets and grabbed my scissors. I cut just the "tea" part out.
4. To place the "tea" on the sign, I just used some scotch tape. I cut off a small piece from the roll of tape and taped the "tea" on the second line of the sign. Now, you can use glue so you don't see the tape, but that is up to you. I thought that using scotch tape would be one, fairly transparent, and two, it wouldn't need to dry like the glue would.
5. Once the word was placed, I continued with my alphabet stickers. I placed the "rific" part next to the "tea" and started on a third line. The only thing I had left was teacher. Now I had a completed sign that read, "You are a tearific teacher".
6. Finished with that part of the gift, I cut around the wording with my scissors until I had the size sign I wanted. Again, think about your final project and cut accordingly.
7. Now, here is the part where you use the hole punch. I actually didn't have one so I improvised. If you have a hole punch, I would punch one single hole in the middle of the sign on the very top. If you don't have a hole punch, you can improvise like me. I took my scissors, opened them all the way up, and placed one blade, point side down, where I wanted the hole. Then I turned the scissors in a circle until I saw that I had a decent sized hole.
8. Once your hole is punched, or made, use the scissors to cut the length of string you want. I took the string and measured against the rim of the mason jar to judge how far I wanted the sign to hang down. Again, this part depends on how large of a jar or glass you are using. It's up to you!
9. After the string is cut, thread one end of the string through the hole you made. Keep threading through the hole until you have an even length of string on both sides of the sign. Put the sign aside. It should look something like this:
   
10. Open up all your Crystal Light packages and decide how much tea your cup or mason jar can hold. Again, this part is up to you. I chose four of each kind just to give variety.
11. Then take your scissors and cut out the directions from the side of the Crystal Light package. This way, whoever you are giving the gift to knows how to use what you are giving them! : ) Another idea is to cut out the nutrition facts. 
12. Once you selected your teas and cut out the directions for the tea, open up your mason jar and start adding whatever you want to include in the gift. 
13. I first added the Target gift card since it was kind of "bulky". Then I placed the directions in the jar and added all my teas. 
14. Before you close the mason jar, grab your sign and loop the string around the top of the jar. Double knot the ends together so it hangs the way you want it to on the jar.
15. Place the lid on the jar and seal tight.
16. Now you have a beautiful gift for a teacher! Here's my finished product:

What you do next is up to you! You can leave the gift as is and hand it to the teacher that way. Or you can put it in a nice gift bag wrapped up in tissue paper. That's what I opted for. Since the mason jar is glass, and I have a kindergartener, I thought the bag would be a safer option!

The great part about this gift is that it doesn't have to be just for teachers! It can be for friends, family members, co-workers, grab-bag gifts! Whatever you want it to be! Just change the "teacher" part and you are all set! You can even write out the word terrific and use the "tea" cutout for the "teacher" part since it begins with the same letters. Instead of iced tea packets, you can use teabags. The possibilities are endless! Be creative!

I hope this gave you some ideas for the future. It's a relatively inexpensive gift that shows that you care And make sure you check out Pinterest! Or tell me to stop... Maybe I need an intervention?!

Babies and Strangers

Ever since I have become pregnant and have had two children I have noticed a very peculiar trend... You could be in the store, you could be working, you could be walking down the street, you could be in a public restroom, you could be attending a conference at your child's school, really no matter where you go, strangers are drawn to you and your pregnant belly or your child like a moth to a lamp. It's the oddest thing. It's like once you become pregnant or once you become a parent, there is no social etiquette for strangers and how they look or what they say to you and your child...

Now, I'm not talking about the random people who come up to you and say, "Aww. How sweet. A newborn. How old are they?". Or those people who tell you, "Wow. Your daughter has such beautiful hair!". Those are welcome comments. It's endearing. I often do it myself. Babies, kids, even preteens sometimes, are just so darn cute that you have to say something. I get that. It's sort of normal.

What I am talking about, and what perpetuated this blog/rant, is this type of stranger...

Last week I was grocery shopping with my husband, my daughter, and my son. My son, who is going to be seven months, had a wet diaper and didn't particularly like it. So I grabbed my diaper bag and headed off to the Stop and Shop bathroom. Luckily it had a changing station (don't even get me started on how many family restaurants and places don't have them at all). I whipped out my changing pad, diaper, and wipes, and got to business. When I change John, or even when I help Amelia get dressed, I talk to them. It's natural and keeps them occupied during an otherwise boring, mundane task. So, there I am, taking off John's diaper, and babbling on when an old woman (who just finished her own business) waltzes over and starts talking to me and my baby. She's asking how old he is, saying how cute he is, telling me about her great grand kid who's the same age. She's going on and on.

I know that she's someone's mom and grandma, and she's probably very nice. But, my son is naked on a changing table. Plus, I'm trying to chat with him and keep him from wanting to roll right off the table. And this lady is talking to me like she is my best friend and like it's completely normal for her to be doing so while I'm wiping my baby's butt. Well, it's NOT normal...

I respect the fact that she thinks my kid is cute and all and that he reminds her of her grandchild, but it's weird for you to be talking to me and my baby while I'm changing him. His privates are out for the whole world to see. I have my hands preoccupied. It's not natural to be talking to a complete stranger during this whole process. It's like strangers think that because it's a baby anything goes... 

Well, let me ask you this? Does my baby barge in on your closed stall door while you're sitting on the toilet doing your thing? Does my baby have full conversations with you in the bathroom? Are you sitting there exposed for the whole world? I'm pretty sure we can all agree that the answer is NO! Thanks for the sweet compliments, but please let my baby get changed without having to worry about complete strangers staring at his naked body. I have never done this to another parent. No matter how cute their child is or what they are doing. Even before I was a parent I didn't do this. It's just not normal. It's not a proper social custom. Just because they are tiny, cute, and innocent, doesn't mean that we get to treat them differently.

But, people talking to me while I'm changing my baby is nothing. With Amelia I have heard so much more. Things that you just don't ask strangers. Things that are rude. Or hurtful. And just plain crazy.

A good example is a few months after Amelia was born. For those of you who didn't see Amelia as a baby, or those who don't remember, she was born with a fairly large, very red, strawberry birthmark on her head. It was pretty noticeable since it was just above her forehead and was one of the first things you saw when you looked at her. It didn't bother me, or her for that matter. It was normal. In fact, I forgot it was even there after the first few months. But complete strangers noticed...

We were walking in the mall with Amelia when she was just a few months old. We were just getting onto the elevator and a middle-aged man stepped in right after us. He was looking around the elevator and saw Amelia. He said, "Oh. She's cute." We said the customary "thank-you" thinking that was the end of the conversation. We were wrong... The stranger them looked a little closer at her forehead and asked, "What's that red thing on her head? Did you guys hit her?"

I FREAKING KID YOU NOT! SERIOUSLY?! I honestly don't think I will ever forget this particular incident. SERIOUSLY! This dude, a complete and total stranger, just asked me if I beat my child. Not my child, my INFANT! There are so many wrong things with this situation that I don't know where to start. First off, it's rude of you to even mention the mark on my daughter's forehead. You don't know where it came from, you don't know my family, and you're a stranger. It's none of your damn business. Second, you just accused me of beating my child. I'm gonna leave that one alone because it's both ridiculous and infuriating. Third, even if I did beat my child, would I tell a random person?! Ummm... probably not. And just for the record, I did NOT beat my child. Nor have I ever. Once again, this is a case of social "rules" gone wrong. Just because she is a baby, doesn't mean that you can ask anything thing you want. It's rude. So, just shut up.

And speaking of Amelia, I still get this one to this day! And it's soooo annoying and tiring to answer over and over again...

My husband and I both have dark hair and relatively dark eyes (mine are brown and his are hazel). So naturally, when I was pregnant I always imagined having a dark-haired, dark-eyed baby girl. But, when she popped out, she was blonde as could be with the bluest eyes. I was pretty shocked. But, she was (and still is) beautiful, and I shouldn't have been that shocked. My mom's hair was so blonde when she was little that it was almost white, my sister is a natural dirty blonde, and all my cousins have blonde hair. It's genetics. 

But ever since she was a baby, and to this day, everywhere we go we get asked the same question, "Where does her blonde hair come from?". Really?! I get the compulsion to ask. We all have dark hair and she doesn't. It's different. But one, it's not unheard of. And two, you honestly don't know why she has blonde hair and your question could just as easily offend me and my husband. What if she was adopted? Wouldn't you feel terrible asking us that? What if someone I know passed away and their daughter was left to me and my husband to raise? Wouldn't that bring back bad memories for us? What does it matter if you know where her blonde hair came from? 

It's pretty rude to ask this question. You don't know the reason why and it shouldn't matter to you anyway. Just say my daughter has pretty hair and move on. This question has tired me out so much that I have begun to be creative about my answer to it. "Where does your daughter's blonde hair come from?" "Oh, my husband and I are swingers and had an accident." "Why does your daughter have such blonde hair?" "She really belongs to the Edible Arrangement's guy." These are just a few of my creative answers... I have said all these and more. Because if you think you can come up to me and ask a random, crazy question, then I can tell you some random, crazy answer. Plain and simple.

Even going back to before Amelia was born and when I was pregnant, strangers have NO boundaries. If you have ever been pregnant, and that belly starts to show, you know what I am feeling. You are standing in line at the grocery store, waiting to check out, your feet are swollen, the store is overcrowded, and you just want to get home and eat that pint of Ben&Jerry's with your feet propped on the couch, and suddenly you hear it. The lady behind you says, "Oh, you're pregnant. When are you due?" You rattle off an answer and then there it is. Slowly the lady is reaching out to you with her grubby paws trying to feel your belly. Ahh! No thank-you!

Just because I have a tiny human growing inside my belly and it's visibly obvious, doesn't mean you get to touch it. It's my belly. It's my baby. And once again, I DON'T KNOW YOU! Just because I am pregnant doesn't mean that you get to throw all social boundaries out the window and touch my belly. I don't touch yours, please don't touch mine. Unless I know you, and even then, only if I invite you to. It's just weird.

Ok, I think that pretty much sums it up. I know this is kind of lengthy and a little whiny, but it's so true. If you have ever been pregnant, if you are a parent, or if you are going to be, you know that you have had all these thoughts and encounters and more. It's the truth. So if you are a stranger, just back off. And think before you open your mouth. That's all. Babies and pregnant bellies are adorable. But that doesn't mean that they don't get the same respect as you or I. 

End of story.

Passage

One concept that has always fascinated and scared me is the passage of time. Some days seem to stretch for an eternity, while others are gone before you know it. When we are children, it feels like we have all the time in the world, while as adults, the days aren't long enough. There is never enough time to accomplish what we want. There is never enough time to see all your family and friends. Years go by and you simply cannot believe it. Wasn't it just yesterday that mom and dad were driving us around to school and play dates? Doesn't it seem like last year you were having your first kiss? Or is your high school reunion really coming up already? And you were just holding your newborn, so they can't already be one, right? Where does the time go? And what can we do to slow it down? Or freeze a few moments so they can last just a bit longer...

I know what time is... How many seconds are in a minute, how many minutes are in an hour, how many hours are in a day, how many days are in a week, how many weeks there are in a year. I know how old I am. I remember most of the years that got me to this point in my life. I know how time works. I get it; I really do. It just feels like everything melts together... Time literally flies... It escapes me before I know what is happening...

But to me, nothing signifies the passing of time like watching your children grow up...

Last night I was looking through "old" photo albums and pictures on facebook and I stumbled upon pictures of my little girl when she was just turning one, and then ones of her still sucking her pacifier at two, and then came the big smiles and the curls in her hair. It honestly made me sad; happy, but sad. How did time get away from me that fast? When did my little baby girl become 5?

I remember the day Amelia was born. I was anxious. I was hoping that she would wait until her due date because  08.08.08 would be the coolest, and easiest, birthday ever. I thought I was ready, but truth was I didn't know what to expect. Her birth was surprisingly easy; don't get me wrong, the contractions hurt like hell. But, I sat in the shower, most of my pain went away, I pushed for an hour and there she was. Blonde hair and blue eyes. Definitely not what I expected, but so beautiful and perfect. Chris and I created the most amazing human being and she was all mine; my daughter.

Those first few months were HELL... I got the baby blues so bad. I cried... a lot. I was scared to be left alone with a baby by myself. I didn't sleep enough. I was worried I was doing everything wrong. I was overwhelmed. But seeing her face, and her finally sleeping through the night and getting on the right formula, made it all worth it.

Before I knew it, she was smiling and getting teeth. She was laughing and exploring the world around her. She was commando crawling like a champ. She turned one and shortly after started walking. It was the most amazing, crazy, unexpected year of my life, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Two flew by with more milestones passed. Three came out of nowhere. Four was fun because we got to go to Disney and I was pregnant with my second child. And now, here we are at five... FIVE!

Gone are the chubby cheeks and arms with rolls. Gone are the precious, laughable first word mistakes, like "skissors" for scissors. Gone are the toothless smiles. Gone are the baby giggles. Gone are so many first milestones... I can never get those first five years back. All I have to preserve them are photos, memories, and a few precious videos.  

Now my daughter is almost done being a kindergartner! She has survived her first bus ride. She accomplished her first homework assignment. She had a blast at her first school birthday party. She tackled her first trip through the hot lunch line. She trooped it out with her class on her first field trip. She learned to love her first elementary school teacher. She did it. And again all I have are memories and photos... Time has passed by too fast again.

And with this amazing past year, I gained something just as prized as my baby girl; I have a handsome, happy baby boy...

This time last year, I was just about ready to have an ultrasound telling me if I was going to have a boy or a girl. Well, my little guy wanted the world to know he was all boy because that ultrasound was very telling... I could prepare for my baby shower. I could look at the boy's section of the store and gush over the fact that I didn't have to buy all pink anymore (THANK GOODNESS!). I was going to have a little boy and I was over the moon.

I remember the day of John's birth too... Which is good, because it was just over six months ago... My water broke at about 9:30 at night and John was born at 11:40 on the dot.... I was now a proud parent of a boy and a girl; an official mom of two! But with John's birth came the realization that time would pass by even more...

It feels like just yesterday I was holding this tiny, sweet smelling newborn, so he can't already be almost seven months, can he? But, the smiling, the laughing, the babbling, the first foods, a first (and second growing in) tooth, and scooting on the floor are all indications that once again, six precious months are gone. I have just a few videos, so many pictures, and amazing memories to capture the time that has flown by too fast.

I don't feel old enough to have been married for seven years and to have two healthy, beautiful children. But I am. I'm 27. My 10 year high school reunion is coming up next year. Amelia is about to complete kindergarten. John is going to be crawling before I know it. So much to look forward to, but so much to be missed...

Time passing is such a crazy concept... We watch the days crawl by and see the years flash before our eyes. We are a year older. Our children are a year older. We learn lessons that we won't repeat in the future. We reminisce about decades past. We anticipate future moments, whether they are weddings, upcoming births, or just a good time out. We wish we could go back in time to have one more second with a loved one. We wish we could look into the future and see if we are headed on the right "path". Time either goes by too fast or too slow.

But what I have learned from watching my children grow up (and I sound like my kids are turning 30 and having their own babies...), is that time goes by way too fast. What is five years seems like five seconds. You can't ever get back that loved one. You can't ever experience that first smile or first step again. And the future is always uncertain. So time should be spent living in the moment. Always say, "I love you", one more time. Always give that one quick kiss, even if it means making you a little late. Always stand at the door and wave good-bye to your children on the bus, even if it embarrasses the heck out of them. Always take the time. Because you never know when you won't have the time anymore.   

A Passion...or Obsession...

So this post is going to be a totally different tone than my last. It's much more upbeat and I feel pretty passionately about it. It's all about:

Books!

I am honestly OBSESSED with reading and I am constantly searching for material. I'm pretty eclectic in my taste I've read everything from biographies (Jenny McCarthy) to non fiction (Rumspringa about the Amish tradition of exploring the outside world in order to choose whether they wish to become a member of the community or leave their faith and families) to romance and everything in between. I pretty much love it all; although I do tend to go through phases and read a lot of one type of genre.

In a good week I can read 2-3 books easy. But, my kiddos often get the best of me and I've recently slowed down my progression of books. And to be honest, books cost money and with my rate of reading, it tends to get expensive.

So, this brings me to my current post. I'm going to share a bunch of my favorite books on here. But, not the traditional Top of the New York Times Best Sellers list, although I do like a fair amount of those books*(see * at bottom to see some of my favorites). I'm going to write about what I think are little known books, or books on the rise. And some of them are free books that I just fell in love with. I should note that these books are priced based on the Barnes&Noble Nook (which I should have never gotten because it makes my book obsession worse). I should also note that I don't have deals or promotions with Barnes and Noble or any of the authors I am writing about. I just honestly fell in love with these books and think everyone should read them.

Here's my recent favorites list:

First and foremost is The Testing Trilogy by Joelle Charbonneau. The first book is called The Testing and the most recent release is Independent Study, which just came out on January 7th. I found this book by Googling "Books similar to The Hunger Games". Yes, I am that much of a nerd and yes, I was/am that obsessed with The Hunger Games Trilogy by Suzanne Collins. But, I found an actual list that had books similar to The Hunger Games and it listed The Testing. I looked it up on my Nook, it was $9.17, decided what the hey, and quickly became OBSESSED.

This book is the perfect accompaniment to The Hunger Games trilogy. It's very similar in the fact that it's a trilogy (Duh!), it's set in a dystopian society, it involves teens, there's a lot of death, and has a corrupt government. The story follows Cia, a young adult of sixteen, growing up in a small town (or colony as they are referred to in the book) on the day of her school graduation. Upon their graduation day, students either enter the work force (helping to rebuild a destroyed country) or are chosen for "The Testing" at the University. Only the few top students from each colony are chosen to participate, and the main character is one of those chosen. Once testing is complete, students enter the University, and then are chosen as either a candidate for government officials, doctors, teachers, or other high ranking positions. It's a limited, coveted spot; one that young people are willing to cheat, fight, and even, die for.

The book follows Cia's journey through the Testing with her fellow students from her colony and the people she meets along the way. Much like The Hunger Games, Cia is constantly questioning the motives of those around her and trying to read between the lines of everything that is said to her. I don't want to give too much away, but the book is completely fascinating and perfect for those who are looking for an engrossing dystopian novel.

I like the fact that it's a completely plausible society. The history of the US is described in detailed terms of nuclear and civil war, corrupt governments, and a world where nature strikes back in the form of devastating earthquakes, tsunamis, and hurricanes. All of this could be a far distant United States. The threat of war in our current civilization is always there and it's been said for years by scientists that California is going to basically fall into the ocean due to the San Andreas fault line. Cia's world in The Testing just seems real. Making it scary and possible.

Plus the relationships are interesting; they make you fall in love with certain characters, laugh along with others, and question everything that comes out of anyone's mouth. There are unsuspecting allies, as well as surprising enemies. The concept of the actual testing process is horrifying. Seeing how society has adapted is even more shocking; I would never survive in Cia's world.

Independent Study, the second book in the series, is even more engaging. It has all of the same elements as the first book, with moments that made me literally shriek or had my jaw dropping open. While certain plot lines are obvious, others are unsuspecting, which forever keeps the reader on their toes. When I finished the book, I was instantly wanting more; in fact, I wanted to go back and reread the book again. I want the third book, Graduation Day, to come out tomorrow. It's perfect and I love it. It fills the void left by knowing that The Hunger Games trilogy is over.

Another book that I recently read is A Moment by Maria Hall. This was actually free on my Nook, which made it appealing, but it's also a "distorted" romantic book, which is also one of my current obsessions. While I love dystopian novels, I have an absorbent amount of romantic novels in my Nook library, where troubled boy meets troubled girl, usually in a high school or college setting. Boy hates girl, girl hates boy, both connect through "cosmic" circumstances, and help one another overcome their tortured pasts. Granted they are a little cheesy and most of them follow the same guidelines, but I love them.

In A Moment, the reader meets Liliana, a teen mom, who grows up taking care of her sick mother and autistic child while supporting her family and going to school. At school, she is friends with Alex, who introduces her to his troubled cousin Ryan. Ryan is your traditional good looking "bad boy", who is dark and mysterious, and obviously has his own set of problems. Liliana is reluctantly smitten with Ryan after a life-altering incident, and the book follows their struggles of opening up and facing their demons.

This book is appealing on so many levels. I love the relationships; between Ryan and Liliana, Liliana and her son, Ryan and Alex, Liliana and her mom. So intricate and each one shapes how the characters act, which is exactly what happens to all of us; our parents, relatives, friends, significant others, they all have a huge impact on our thought processes, our actions, and our opinions. I also love this book because of Liliana's relationship with her autistic son. It's heartbreaking and endearing and introduces an autistic child to the reader in a very simplistic way.

It's just a quick, touching read. I recommend it.

Another one of my favorites in the same "bad boy, good girl" genre is Beautiful Disaster and its' companion Walking Disaster by Jamie McGuire. I LOVE these two books! In Beautiful Disaster Abby is a "small town" girl just starting out her freshmen year at college with her best friend America. Abby is closed off to the idea of relationships and love due to her mysterious past, until she meets Travis Maddox, bad boy on campus. Travis is the ultimate man; ripped with muscles, oozing sex, and tatted up... He's also the campus "man-whore"; uses girls and throws them to the side because, you guessed it, his past has closed him off to love as well. But those two just can't seem to shake one another, and when a bet lands Abby living with Travis and his roommate Shepley (coincidentally, America's boyfriend and Travis' cousin), it seems to be fate's divine intervention.

This book had me from the start; I honestly couldn't put it down. I love the whole idea of a "bad boy" and what girl doesn't?! And Travis is the ultimate "bad boy"; muscles, tattoos, fights in an underground ring for money, and you can't seem to hold him down for more than a one night stand. Every girl wants to be "that girl"; the one who pegs down the "bad boy" and makes him change his ways. Travis is such a great character; what you expect, but not really. He's officially my book boyfriend and that's one of the reasons I love this book so much.

Plus, Abby is a spit-fire; the kind of girl who's all sweet and innocent on the outside, but a little sassy on the inside too. She doesn't care to impress the big man on campus; which is how most girls want to be. We want to be who we are and wear what we want and at the end of the day, we want the guy to be ok with that. Her friendship with America is perfect and her interaction with Travis is exciting and fun.

And the great part, what really made me fall in love with these two books, is the fact that Walking Disaster is the same story as Beautiful Disaster, but written from Travis' point of view. Now, while this may seem redundant, it's not. Because while most romance novels, are written from the woman's point of view, you never get to hear what the guy is really thinking. You never understand why he said or did something; let's face it, men are a mystery. But, Walking Disaster, gives us an in-depth look into Travis' family, what he's thinking when he's "whoring" around, how he falls for Abby, what motivates him during certain parts of the book. Sure, it has a lot of the same scenes and the same dialogue as the original, but it has extras too; stuff that maybe you didn't think about, but once you read them, it adds so much to the story. I love love love books with a guy's point of view... And let's be honest, some of us are still hoping for Midnight Sun to be published...

Other great mentions in the "bad boy meets girl and both have a troubled pasts" genre are:
Hopeless by Colleen Coover (which also has a male character's point of view companion, Losing Hope)
Ruining Me and Ruining You by Nicole Reed
Wait for You by J Lynn (male character's point of view is Trust in Me)

And I guess that's all I am going to bore you with for now. These are just a few of the books I have read over the past year that I fell in love with and I hope someone else falls in love with them too.

*The Fault in Our Stars John Green
Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy E.L James
Divergent Trilogy Veronica Roth (although Allegiant was a huge disappointment and seemed like a rip off of The Maze Runner series)
The Hunger Games Trilogy Suzanne Collins